In this iteration of the Locked Door series, you still need to unlock a locked door. Introducing an unlocked cupboard and some statues. That's it? Really?
This solution is by David Welbourn, and is based on Release 1 of the game.
SPOILERS AHEAD. Reading a walkthrough prematurely can sometimes diminish one's enjoyment of an interactive fiction game. Please make an honest effort to play the game before reading this walkthrough.
Only after you've snorted the protein powder are you strong enough to lift the barbell.
> x barbell. lift it.(stronger!)
> w.
Green Room
> hit striker with hammer.(+1: DING!)
> take grabber.
> e. nw.
Cavernous Chamber
> grab brass key with grabber.(+1)
> u. n. e.
White Room
> unlock office door with brass key. s.
Tidy Office
> x safe. spin dial to 0451.(+1; safe opens!)
> x ingot. take it.
> n. w. s. d. sw. e. sw.
Yellow Room
> x balance. put ingot on it.(+1; creaking east)
> ne. e. se.
Black Room
An secret exit downward is revealed.
> d.
Sewer
> x herring. take it.
> e. u. n. n.
Softball Field
> x cleats. take cleats.
> s. s. w. n.
Kitchen
> x lard. take it.
> s. e. d. s.
Mysterious Passage
> x billboard. x graffiti.
> x arch. x runes.("SPEAK MELON AND ENTER")
> say melon.(nice try)
> use book on melon.(+1; arch opens!)
> s.
Antechamber
> x statues. w.
Elevator
> x gearbox.
> push button —or— turn on gearbox.(The elevator goes downward.)
> e. e.
Hall of Ancestors
> drop ladder. stand on it.
> x scaffolding. x dwarf. untie rope.(+1)
> take rope. x rope.
> stand. take ladder.
> s.
Hall of Glory
> x flame. e.
Hall of Dinnerware
> x spork. take it. n.
Hall of Feasting
> x cauldron. x ham.
> take ham.(using the spork)
> s. e.
Hall of Gifting
> x mug. take it.
> n.
Hall of Admissions
> x bouncer.(green, has fur hat)
> e.(You need to look like, dress like, and smell like a goblin.)
> smell bouncer.(fishy)
> n.
Hall of Stationery
> drop ladder. stand on it.
> x stack. take leaf. x it.
> stand. take ladder.
> w.
Hall of Munitions
> x barrel. pry barrel with crowbar.(+1)
> x gunpowder.
> take gunpowder.(using mug)
> w.
Hall of History
> x bucket. take it.
Time to disguise yourself as a goblin. Rex will be your "fur hat" indefinitely once he's on your head.
> remove jumpsuit.(optional)
> pour paint on me.
> rub herring on me. smell me.
> throw ham. wear Rex.
> s. e. e.
Hall of Admissions
> e.(You're accepted as a goblin.)
Tomb of Uggo
> x barrier. x sarcophagus.
You must blow up the barrier. The first step is to leave the mug of gunpowder here, with the rope also in the mug as a fuse.
> drop mug. put rope in mug.
Go to the Eternal Flame:
> w. w. w. s.
Hall of Glory
Either the scrap of paper or the leaf of paper can be used as your firebrand, but the timing is very tight. Don't waste any turns whatsoever.
Also, it's burn something WITH FLAME. So fussy.
> burn scrap with flame.
> n. e. e. e.
Tomb of Uggo
> burn rope with scrap.("3...")
Don't stay to watch!
> w.
Hall of Admissions
> z.(+1: KABOOM!)
> e.
Tomb of Uggo
> pry sarcophagus with crowbar.(+1)
> x axe. take axe.
> w. w. w. w. w.
Elevator (lower level)
> push button. e. n. n. w. w. u.
Orchard
> drop ladder. stand on it.
> x treetop.(has nest with doorknob)
> take nest.(no: out of reach)
> chop limb with axe.(+1)
> stand.
> take doorknob.
> w.
Old Garage
> x door. open it.(rusted)
> pry door with crowbar.(+1)
> in.
Garage Interior
> x tube. take it.
> out. e. d. s.
Chasm
> x drawbridge.(rusted)
Guess-the-verb challenges abound in this game, don't they?
> pour lard on drawbridge.(+1)
> s.
Cesspool
> drop tube. ride tube. s.
Island
> stand. in.
Booth
The drawbridge won't lower unless you greased it with lard earlier.
> x panel. push button.(+1. Drawbridge lowers.)
> out.
Island
> ride tube. n.
Cesspool
> stand. n.
Chasm
CAUTION: The bridge is dangerously slippery! Wear cleats!
> wear cleats. w. w.
Thief's Den
> x cutters. take it.
> e. e. n. e. e. u. e.
Locker Room
> x locker.(padlocked)
> cut lock with cutters.(+1)
> take lunchbox. x it. open it.
> x apple. take it.
Return to Bob in the White Room:
> w. d. w. u. nw. nw. u. n. e.
White Room
> give apple to Bob.(now friendly)
> ask Bob for iron key.(+1; it's yours)
> unlock wooden door with iron key.
> open wooden door.(+1, using the doorknob)
> n.
Gray Room
> x case. open it.
> x trophy. take it.(+1)
*** The End ***
Extras
Characters
Bob is in the White Room. He has an iron key, but he'd really like an apple.
Rex is a dog who follows you everywhere.
A goblin bouncer guards the entrance to the Tomb of Uggo; only goblins are allowed inside.
Found dead:
A hanged dwarf is hanging from a rope tied to the scaffolding in the Hall of Ancestors.
Mentioned:
Uggo is a dwarven king whose sarcophagus is in his tomb, but only his axe is inside the coffin.
Endings
All endings end with The End.
You die if you fall off the slippery lard-covered drawbridge because you weren't wearing the cleats.
You die if the explosion happens where you are.
You win if you take the trophy.
If you eat the apple, the game is now unwinnable.
Inventory
Items are listed in the order acquired in this walkthrough.
a sparkly jumpsuit. You're wearing it.
Keep wearing it or remove it. The jumpsuit doesn't matter.
a rotten cantaloupe. It's in the garden.
In the mysterious chamber, to throw your voice into the cantaloupe, use the book on the cantaloupe. Since the melon appeared to speak, the archway opens.
a crowbar. It's in the shed interior.
In the warehouse, pry the crate with the crowbar.
Outside the old garage, pry the door with the crowbar.
In the hall of munitions, pry the barrel with the crowbar.
In the Tomb of Uggo, after the barrier is destroyed, pry the sarcophagus with the crowbar.
a flashlight. It's in the crate in warehouse; pry the crate with the crowbar.
Turn the flashlight on to see in the cavernous cavern, the game's only unlit room.
Note: The flashlight's power won't run out.
a step ladder. It's in the storage closet.
In locations with things above you, drop the ladder and stand on it, then look at the high thing and interact with whatever you see there. STAND to get off the ladder. Don't forget to take the ladder again.
In the library, stand on the ladder, examine the shelf, then take the book from the shelf.
In the Hall of Ancestors, stand on the ladder, examine the scaffolding, then untie and take the rope.
In the Hall of Stationery, stand on the ladder, examine the stack, then take the leaf of paper.
In the orchard, stand on the ladder, examine the treetop, then chop the limb with the axe.
a sledgehammer. It's in the storage closet.
In the narrow hallway, hit the flimsy door with the hammer to open it.
In the green room, after successfully lifting the barbell in the blue room (see protein powder), hit the striker with the hammer to jostle the grabber off the striker's bell and onto the floor.
a plunger. It's in the bathroom.
Plunge the toilet with the plunger to unclog it.
Ventriloquism For Dummies. It's the book on the high shelf in the library; see ladder.
Open and read the book; the book contains a scrap of paper.
In the mysterious chamber, to throw your voice into the cantaloupe, use the book on the cantaloupe. Since the melon appeared to speak, the archway opens.
Read it; it always says 0451. In the tidy office, spin the dial to 0451 to open the safe.
Either the scrap or leaf of paper can be used as a firebrand to light a fuse. Drop a makeshift bomb (mug containing gunpowder and rope) in the Tomb of Uggo. Go to the Hall of Glory and burn the scrap with the flame. As quickly as possible, return to the Tomb and burn the rope with the scrap before the scrap burns out.
a straw and a protein powder. The straw's in the red room. The powder's in the magenta room's cupboard.
In the cyan room, pour the powder onto the mirrored table, then snort the powder with the straw. You are now strong enough to lift the barbell in the blue room.
a grabber. It's on the bell of the striker in the green room.
To get the grabber, you must first increase your strength twice; see straw and powder. After successfully lifting the barbell in the blue room, return to the green room and hit the striker with the hammer; the grabber falls to the floor. Take it.
In the cavernous chamber, grab the brass key with the grabber.
a brass key. It's in the crack in the cavernous chamber. Grab the key with the grabber.
In the white room, unlock the office door with the brass key.
an ingot. It's in the locked safe in the tidy office. Spin the dial to 0451 to unlock the safe; this number is on the scrap of paper.
In the yellow room, put the ingot on the balances to open a secret passage in the black room.
a red herring. It's in the sewer.
Rub the herring on yourself to make yourself smell fishy, just like a goblin.
a cleats. They're in the softball field.
Wear the cleats. They're necessary for safely crossing the lard-covered drawbridge; otherwise you fall to your death.
a tub of lard. It's in the kitchen.
At the chasm, pour the lard on the rusty drawbridge to lubricate it.
a rope. It's a noose tied to the scaffolding and hanged dwarf in the Hall of Ancestors. Stand on the ladder, untie the rope, and take the rope.
Use the rope as a fuse: put the rope into the mug of gunpowder.
After placing your makeshift mug bomb in the Tomb of Uggo, burn the rope with a burning paper (see scrap or leaf), then leave the Tomb and wait for the explosion. The explosion destroys the plexiglass barrier.
a spork. It's in the Hall of Dinnerware.
In the Hall of Feasting, take the ham hock (using the spork).
a ham hock. It's in the cauldron in the Hall of Feasting. You must have the spork to take it; it's too hot to take otherwise.
Throw the ham hock; Rex is now gnawing it. Now wear Rex (on your head); he's okay with that. Rex serves as a "fur hat" and you now are dressed like a goblin.
a mug. It's in the Hall of Gifting.
In the Hall of Munitions, take the gunpowder; the gunpowder is now in the mug.
In the Tomb of Uggo, drop the mug and put the rope into the mug as well.
a leaf of paper. It's on top of the stack in the Hall of Stationery. Stand on the ladder and take the leaf.
Either the leaf or scrap of paper can be used as a firebrand to light a fuse. Drop a makeshift bomb (mug containing gunpowder and rope) in the Tomb of Uggo. Go to the Hall of Glory and burn the leaf with the flame. As quickly as possible, return to the Tomb and burn the rope with the leaf before the leaf burns out.
some gunpowder. It's inside the barrel in the Hall of Munitions; pry the barrel with the crowbar to open it.
Pour the paint on yourself to make yourself green; you now look like a goblin.
Rex. This adorable dog is in the white room initially, but he follows you everywhere.
Throw the ham hock; Rex is now gnawing it. Now wear Rex (on your head); he's okay with that. Rex serves as a "fur hat" and you now are dressed like a goblin.
an axe. It's inside the sarcophagus in the Tomb of Uggo; pry the sarcophagus with the crowbar.
In the orchard, while standing on the ladder, chop the limb with the axe to get the nest to ground level.
a nest. It's in the treetop in the orchard; stand on the ladder then chop the limb with the axe to get the nest to ground level.
In the white room, after unlocking the wooden door with the iron key, you can open the wooden door if you have the doorknob. You automatically attach the doorknob to the door as part of your attempt to open it.
an inner tube. It's in the garage interior.
At the cesspool, drop the tube and ride it; now you can go south to the island. Stand to get off the tub.
To return from the island, ride the tube as before.
a bolt cutters. They're in the thief's den.
In the locker room, cut the lock with the cutters to open the locker.
a lunchbox. It's in the padlocked locker in the locker room; cut the lock with the bolt cutters.
