In this fantasy adventure, you play as Bob the Barbarian, armed only with your dull wits. You've crossed miles of wasteland to rescue the princess Xandina from the evil sorcerer Zarayeb and prove yourself worthy of your proud barbarian heritage. Let's do this.
This solution is by David Welbourn, and is based on Release 1 of the game.
SPOILERS AHEAD. Reading a walkthrough prematurely can sometimes diminish one's enjoyment of an interactive fiction game. Please make an honest effort to play the game before reading this walkthrough.
Map 1: Talonwich Forest, Flixton, and Black Desert
Map 2: Island and Pirate Ship
Map 3: Endless Desert
Map 4: Ogre Hut and Sorcerer's Castle
Waltkhrough
East Forest Entrance
> x me. i.(loincloth and boots only)
The man suddenly notices you, introduces himself as Codby the Bureaucrat who needs to get to Flixton on the other side of the forest. He promises an adequate reward if you'd just lead the way.
> x loincloth. x boots. x Codby. x forest.
> ask him about forest.
> ask him about himself.
> ask him about Flixton.
> w.
Forest (west of entrance)
Use UNDO to your advantage; the game doesn't offer you anything better at this point. When you miss a hit and the troll hits you, UNDO it. Try to kill the troll over-and-over again, with strategic UNDOs to succeed.
> kill troll —or— undo(repeat as necessary until troll is dead; +10 with your victory)
> take club.
> w. s.
Forest Crossroads
> kill thief with club —or— undo.(repeat as necessary until the thief is defeated and runs off; +10 with your victory)
> x sign. read sign.(You can't.)
> Codby, read sign.(Flixton is to the southeast.)
> se. e. s.
South Forest Entrance
+10. Codby gives you something and leaves before you can react.
> i. x coin.
> x buildings.(small town)
> x east.(eerie path)
> sw. s. s.
Flixton South
> x door. x sign. x beggar.
> give coin to beggar.(+10)
> x rod.
> e.
Book Shoppe
> x Agatha. x cat. x case. x scroll.
> x counter. x books.
> ask her about herself.
> ask her about scrolls.(spell of protection; expensive)
> ask her about services.
> ask her about books. ask her about cat.
> ask her about beggar.
> ask her about barber.
> ask her about desert.(black or endless?)
> ask her about black desert.(Could be anything buried in there, but it's too hot to stay long.)
> ask her about town.(forest north, desert west, ocean south, wizard east)
> w. s.
Dock
> x boat. x bottle. x label.
> x sail.(has tear)
> x ocean.
> enter boat. take bottle.
> out. n. n. n. w. w.
Dirt Road West
> x farmstead. w.
Farm North
> x haystack. search it.(nothing)
> s.
Farm South
> x hut.
> w.
Peasant Hut
> x table. x chair. x shovel.
> x cauldron. x beans. x ladle.
> take shovel.
Return to the forest:
> e. n. e. e. e. ne.
South Forest Entrance
> n. w. nw. nw. n. n.
Black Desert
The dowsing rod points down suddenly, and you make a divot to mark the spot.
> dig divot.(with the shovel)
> take rock.(+10; the heat is getting bad)
> s.
North Forest Entrance
> x rock.(shiny metallic)
Return to the haystack:
> s. se. se. e. s. sw. w. w. w.
Farm North
> enter haystack.
In The Haystack
Something small hits and sticks to the lodestone.
> x lodestone.(too dark to see in here.)
> out.
Farm North
> x lodestone.(has a needle stuck to it)
> x needle.
Let's get drunk.
> open bottle.(keeping the cork)
> drink rum.
Try to go anywhere, but it's quickest if you aim for the forest crossroads.
> DIRECTION.(Repeat. You'll stumble around, enter the forest, and eventually arrive at...)
Clearing
... and you pass out.
> z. z. z. z.(until the game let's you get up.)
> x tent. in.
Tent
> take spectacles.(+10)
> wear spectacles.(You feel smarter. In fact, you can now read.)
> x label.("Captain Alis Overproof Rum - For only the most self-loathing sea-dogs.")
> take pouch. open it. x thread.
> out.
Clearing
Make sure you have both the spectacles and thread with you when you leave the clearing. Don't leave anything behind because you can't return here.
> s. e. s. sw. s.
Flixton Middle
> read sign.
> s.
Flixton South
> read sign.
> s.
Dock
> enter boat.
> thread needle with thread.(+10)
> sew sail.(It's now patched.)
> raise sail.
At Sea
> z. z. z.
Dock (island)
The breeze is now northward.
> lower sail.(already done)
> out. s.
Island (at flagpole)
> x flag. read placard.
> s.
Pirate Treasury
> x torch. take it.
> n. e. se.
Pier
> x ship. x gangplank.
> e.
Main Deck Fore
Use nautical direction while on board.
> kill pirate with club —or— undo.(repeat until pirate is knocked out; +10)
> take concertina.
CAUTION: Don't go aft from here to Main Middeck. The crew there will kill you.
> open hatch. d. aft. aft.
Gundeck Aft
> hit pirate with club —or— undo(repeat until he falls; +10)
> search pirate. x handkerchief.
While you can pick up the handkerchief and keep it, it's worthless to you.
> u.
Main Deck Aft
Needless to say, don't wake the macaw.
> open door. aft.
Captain's Quarters
> open wardrobe.
> x compass.(small, missing a needle)
> take compass.(+10; it starts to hum)
> open porthole.
> put compass in porthole.
> f. d. f. f. u.
Main Deck Fore
You hear the pirate queen scream. Uh-oh.
> w.
Pier
And this is why you needed the torch:
> burn gangplank(with torch).(+10; the pirate queen throws something heavy at you.)
> look. take bracelet.(+10)
> x it. x queen.
> nw. w. s.
Pirate Treasury
> put torch in sconce.
> n. e. se. sw.
Beach
You can't carry anything while swimming.
> x sand. drop all.
> s. e. d.
Seabed (east end)
Correction: You can carry the compass while swimming.
> take compass.
> u. w. n.
Beach
> take all. put needle in compass.
> wear bracelet.
> ne. nw. w. n.
Dock (of island)
> enter boat. raise sail. z. z. z.
Dock (near Flixton)
> out. n. n. w.
Barber Shop
> x jar. x quicksilver.
> x chair. x Bumble. x apron. x curtain.
> s.(blocked by Bumble)
Make darn sure you're wearing the bracelet before you dare sit down in that chair.
> sit on chair.(The bracelet gives you some slack against a strap.)
Bumble heads south to get leeches, etc.
> open strap. stand. take jar.(+10)
CAUTION: Don't go south looking for Bumble. He has chloroform and knows how to use it.
> e.
Flixton Middle
The barber shop is now closed.
With the repaired compass and the jar of quicksilver, you're almost ready to brave the endless desert, but first, you need to procure a camel. Find one at the north end of the dirt road.
Attack him with flatulence, a classic barbarian move.
> fart.
Hmm. Perhaps you need some help.
> w. s. w. s. w.
Peasant Hut
> take ladle. eat beans.
Move quickly! Don't waste turns!
> e. n. e. n. e.
Abdul's Camel Rental
> z.(You break wind. Abdul can't stand the stench and abandons the tent for a few turns.)
> open box. take key.(+10)
> w.
Dirt Road North
> unlock camel with key. take lock.
> get on camel. w.
Desert (east of the sandstorm)
> x compass.(points west)
> w. w.
Within The Storm
Compass directions in the storm are erratic and random. Only the compass can tell you where to go.
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.(+10)
Desert (west of the storm)
> x compass.(points west)
> w. w.
Barge Deck
> stand.
Don't worry about re-locking the camel. It's too bored to run off, and no-one's going to steal it.
> d. aft.
Barge Aft
> x altar. x vase. look in it.
> pour mercury into vase.(A ruby floats to the top.)
> x ruby. take it.(+10)
> fore. u.
Barge Deck
> ride camel.
> e. e. e.
Within The Storm
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.
> x compass. DIRECTION-OF-COMPASS.
Desert
> e. e.
Dirt Road North
> stand.
Feel free to or keep the key and lock, discard them, or return them to Abdul. For simplicity's sake, this walkthrough opts to keep them.
Return to the book shoppe:
> s. e. e. s. s. e.
Book Shoppe
> buy scroll with ruby.(+10. The trade is made, then Agatha teleports you outside.)
Flixton South
The book shoppe is now closed.
> read scroll.
CAUTION: The protection spell is called "Morxis", but don't cast it yet! The spell only lasts a single turn, and it's the only thing that has any chance of protecting you from the evil sorcerer himself.
> n. n. ne. e.
Eerie Path
You hear strange music and singing from the hut to the south.
> s.
Hut
Three ogres with strange string instruments see your concertina, give you an anthem to practice, then they bum-rush you out of the hut and lock the door. +10.
Eerie Path
> read anthem.
> play it.(no, wrong verb)
> sing it.(no, try burping it)
> burp it.(no one here to appreciate it)
> e.
Outside Castle
This is Zarayeb's castle, but it's not wise to boldly charge into his courtyard where most of his guards are. It's much better to go around and find another way in.
> ne. e. se.
Behind Castle
> x grate. open it.(can't)
> look through it.(dark shaft)
> stand on grate. jump. g. g.(+10; the grate falls apart and you fall into...)
Tunnel (east end)
> w.
Tunnel (middle)
A large gray ogre with a crossbow greets you as dinner.
> burp anthem. g. g.(+10; the ogre is overcome with emotion)
You can't get the crossbow, but he lets you pass.
> x ogre.
> w.
Tunnel (west end)
> save
> u.
Lair
You accidentally wake up Zarayeb when you enter. He quickly immobilizes you so he can he can do his evil villain monologue.
> x man. x staff. x throne.
He now points a ball of plasma at you, just as the paralysis spell wears off. Hope you didn't use the scroll earlier.
> cast morxis.(+20. The orb of protection surrounds you, and Zarayeb's spell bounces off, incinerating him. The shockwave also fling the doors open.)
> look. take staff.
> sit on throne.
The throne revolves. You're now facing a treasure hoard and Princess Xandina.
*** You have won ***
Extras
Characters
Bob the Barbarian is you! You come from a long line of barbarians and this is your first chance to prove yourself by rescuing the princess.
Codby the Bureaucrat is a small nervous man you meet at the east forest entrance. He needs you to protect him on his way to the town of Flixton.
A troll attacks you with his club as soon as you enter the forest. He's squat and hairy.
A thief attacks you with his dueling sword when you enter the forest crossroads. He wears spectacles and green clothing.
A beggar clad in rags sits outside the book shoppe. His face is an utter ruin except for one brilliant blue eye.
Agatha the bookwoman is the short old woman who runs the book shoppe. She has gray hair, gray eyes, and gray clothes.
A cat sits atop the glass case in the book shoppe. It's large and gray.
Bumble the barber is a portly man who is quite keen to perform questionable medical procedures on you if you would just kindly sit in his chair.
Three ogres (one tall and thin, one short and squat, and one female and blonde) are playing strange stringed instruments in their hut.
A portly pirate attacks you with his fists when you board the pirate ship. He carries a concertina.
A smelly pirate attacks you with his fists when you reach the aft end of the gundeck.
The pirates at midships are an eclectic mix of ruffians.
A large macaw is sleeping on a perch just outside the captain's cabin.
The pirate queen is tall and has blazing red hair. She glares angrily at you after you escape her vengeance.
A camel is at Dirt Road North, looking bored.
Abdul the camel merchant is a huge, sweating Arab with suspicious green eyes. Find him in his tent if you want to rent his camel.
Dozens of guards in the castle courtyard, all armed and dressed in black, are chanting and marching slowly as if hypnotized.
A gray ogre armed with a crossbow is pleased to see you in the tunnel under the castle. After all, it's not every day that dinner delivers itself.
Zarayeb the evil sorcerer sits on his throne in his lair. Listen to his litany of woes before he obliterates you with a plasma ball.
Princess Xandina is imprisoned with Zarayeb's other treasures, but, really, the less said about her, the better.
Mentioned:
A peasant is absent from their hut, but at least they left you something to eat.
Other evil sorcerers don't get harassed by heroes as often as Zarayeb does. He had to kill those heroes.
Buzzards eat you in the black desert death ending.
Credits
This is the response to CREDITS:
Bob The Barbarian A text adventure game by Charles Moore, Jr.
Release 1. Serial number 260828.
Dialog compiler version 1c/02. Library version 1.2.3.
In-game help is available via the command HELP WITH... Can be used multiple times for progressive hints.
Many thanks to Andrew Apted, R.J. Kowalski, Gianluca Girelli, and Allyson Gray for input and beta-testing.
Endings
You have lost
if either the portly pirate or the smell pirate defeats you. You're tossed in the brig, then abandoned in an alien land.
You have died
if the troll kills you.
if the thief kills you.
if you die of heat stroke in the black desert.
if Bumble the barber kills you.
if you drown.
if the pirates as a group kill you.
if the castle guards kill you.
if the ogre in the tunnel kills you.
if Zarayeb the evil sorcerer kills you.
You have won
if you rescue Princess Xandina.
Inventory
Items are listed in the order you acquire them in this walkthrough.
your loincloth and a pair of leather boots. You're wearing both.
Ignore them. You won't willingly remove them.
a club. A troll in the forest near the east entrance is carrying it. Defeat the troll in combat, then take his club.
Use the club as your weapon when fighting the thief in the forest crossroads, the portly pirate on the main fore deck, and the smelly pirate in the aft gundeck.
a dull copper coin. Codby gives it to you when you both arrive at the south forest entrance.
At Flixton South, give the coin to the beggar. He gives you the dowsing rod in exchange.
a dowsing rod. At Flixton South, the beggar gives you the rod in exchange for the copper coin.
Take the rod into the Black Desert. There, it acts on its own, and you make a divot where it points to. Dig the divot with your shovel.
a liquor bottle containing some rum and closed with a cork. It's in the sailboat at the dock south of the town. Enter the boat to be able to reach the bottle.
Go to the south forest entrance, open the bottle, and drink the rum. You are now drunk. Try to go somewhere repeatedly until you stumble into a forest clearing and pass out. This is the only way to reach the clearing.
The empty bottle and cork are worthless to you.
a shovel. It's in the peasant hut.
In the Black Desert, after you make a divot where the dowsing rod pointed to, dig the divot with the shovel. Take the rock you find. It's a lodestone.
a lodestone. Find it buried in the Black Desert; see dowsing rod and shovel.
At Farm North, carry the lodestone inside the haystack. In the darkness, a needle is attracted to the stone and sticks to it. Leave the haystack to see your new needle.
a needle. Acquire it by entering the haystack at north end of the farm while carrying the lodestone.
At the dock south of town, enter the sailboat, thread the needle with thread and sew the sail. You can now raise the sail to travel by sea.
After you retrieve the compass from both the pirate ship and the lagoon, put the needle into the compass to make it functional.
a pair of spectacles. It's in the thief's tent in the hidden forest clearing; see liquor bottle.
Wear the spectacles and leave them on. You're now smarter and able to read.
a leather pouch. It's in the thief's tent in the hidden forest clearing; see liquor bottle.
a lit torch. It's a sconce in Pirate Treasury, the cave on the island.
CAUTION: Don't put the torch down anywhere, or it goes out. The only safe place to leave it is back in the sconce where you found it.
Have the torch with you when you infiltrate the pirate ship. After you've tossed the compass out the porthole and made it back to Main Deck Fore, the pirate queen screams bloody murder. To survive: go west onto the pier and immediately burn the gangplank (with the torch) from that side, trapping the pirates on their ship. They can't swim.
a concertina. The portly pirate at Main Deck Fore has it. Defeat him in combat, then take it.
Carry the concertina into the ogres' hut. They see the instrument and give you an anthem to practice before bum-rushing you back out again.
Note: While you can try to play the concertina, you never need to.
a handkerchief. Find it by searching the smelly pirate in the aft gundeck after defeating him.
You immediately drop the hanky after finding it because it's gross. While you can pick it up again, don't bother.
a compass. It's inside the wardrobe in the captain's quarters.
Open the porthole and put the compass in it. If you carry the compass out the door, the macaw wakes up and sounds the alarm.
After trapping the pirates on their ship (see torch), fetch the compass from the seabed.
The compass only works in the endless desert while riding the camel. Go the direction the compass points to until you reach the half-buried barge, especially when "within the storm". Use the compass on your return journey too; it always points to where you need to go.
a silver bracelet. After you trap the pirates on their ship (see torch), the pirate queen throws this bracelet at you. Take it.
In the Barber Shop, wear the bracelet before sitting on the chair. Bumble straps you down as you'd expect, but the bracelet gives you enough slack to open the strap and stand up again before he returns to the room. Take his jar of quicksilver and escape this shop of horrors.
a jar containing some quicksilver. It's in the Barber Shop.
Bumble the barber won't let you take the jar while he's in the room. To get the jar, first wear the bracelet and sit in the chair. Bumble leaves the room to fetch who-knows-what. Open the strap and stand. You can do this because the bracelet gave you some slack in that arm. Take the jar and go.
In Barge Aft, pour the quicksilver (also known as mercury) into the vase. A ruby floats to the top. Take the ruby.
a ladle. It's in the peasant hut.
Still in the peasant hut, while holding the ladle, eat some beans, then quickly run directly to and into Abdul's tent and wait until you break wind there. Abdul leaves his tent for several turns. While he's gone, open his box and take his key.
CAUTION: There is only one serving of beans to eat. If you fart somewhere else, the game is now unwinnable.
a copper key. It's in a box in Abdul's Camel Rental. The box that Abdul is sitting on.
In the Peasant Hut while holding the ladle, eat the beans then quickly run to Abdul and break wind in his tent. He can't stand the stench and leaves. Open the box and take the key.
The key unlocks the lock on the camel outside, at Dirt Road North.
a camel lock. It's on the camel at Dirt Road North, preventing anyone from taking the camel.
Unlock the lock with the copper key. Now you can ride the camel into the endless desert and back.
a ruby. It's hidden deep in an vase attached to an altar in Barge Aft, deep in the endless desert. Pour quicksilver into the vase to make the ruby float to the top.
a scroll. It's in a glass case in the Book Shoppe. Buy it with the ruby.
You must be wearing the spectacles to be able to read the scroll. Read the scroll to learn how to cast Morxis, a powerful spell of protection.
CAUTION: The spell duration is a single turn and can only be used once!
In Zarayeb's Lair, when he has conjured a ball of plasma with his staff, CAST MORXIS to both save yourself and fry him when his spell rebounds.
a scrap of parchment. In the ogres' hut, they give you this copy of their anthem when they see you carrying the concertina.
Note: You're not much of a singer. You prefer to BURP or BELCH songs.
In the tunnel under the sorcerer's castle where a large gray ogre with a crossbow is lurking, belch the anthem three times. The ogre is so overcome with patriotic emotion, he lets you pass by him.
a wooden staff. Zarayeb is carrying it in his lair. He drops it when he dies.
You have no use for the staff. It's just another stick in the hands of a barbarian like you.
Score
This is the response to SCORE:
You currently have N points out of a maximum of 220 in T moves.
Points are awarded as follows:
10 points for getting the Morxis scroll
10 points for getting the ogre anthem from the ogre trio
10 points for incapacitating the gray ogre
10 points for getting the ruby
10 points for getting the compass
10 points for finding the lodestone
10 points for finding the needle in the haystack
10 points for finding the spectacles
10 points for geting the coin from Codby
10 points for getting the dowsing rod from the beggar
10 points for getting the bracelet from the pirate queen
10 points for getting the jar from Bumble
10 points for getting the key to the camel lock
10 points for getting through the sandstorm
10 points for defeating the thief
10 points for defeating the troll
10 points for defeating the portly pirate
10 points for defeating the smelly pirate
10 points for escaping the pirate ship
10 points for getting through the grate into the castle
the support of Robin Johnson, Ville Lavonius, Andrew Schultz, Kenneth Hon, Carl Muckenhoupt, Mark Musante, Phil Tatro, Allyson Gray, Daniel Stelzer, and Tabitha;
the generous support of Janice M Eisen, Matthew Foxley, Thomas Insel, Brian Long, Andy Volk, and Håvar Hojem;
